Tuesday, January 25, 2011

"I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness"

I liked Savage Garden a lot when I was in high school. I used to like reading their lyrics as much as I liked listening to them.

"I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness."

Those words have been playing over and over in my head lately. It's time for me to forgive.

I just read an article in Marie Claire about a teenage girl who killed two senior citizen sisters when she was driving drunk.

She's become a speaker about drunk driving (even though she is in prison) and before the first time she spoke, the daughter/niece of the women she killed hugged her, forgave her and told her that if she needed strength, to ask her mother/aunt for it, and they would help her.

I felt incredibly guilty after reading that story.

If this woman, whose mother and aunt were taken from her by a drunk teenager, can forgive...why can't I?

Why am I carrying around all this hurt and anger towards somebody that HASN'T killed any members of my family? Isn't that the worst thing somebody can do to another?

"Forgiveness is the key to my unhappiness."

I can't be happy and I can't move on until I forgive...so I am going to forgive.

I forgive this person for how they treated me for years. I forgive this person for how they threw me away and disregarded me like I never mattered, like I never did a million things for them, like I wasn't the best I possibly could have been.

I forgive.

I forgive.

I forgive.

I forgive this person, because as much as they hurt me, they are not hurting. They do not care. And the only person I am hurting is myself...and I deserve better than that. (The people who do matter...my friends and family...also deserve better than to deal with a melodramatic mess.)

Other lyrics that come to mind (I'm big on relating songs to real life) is Don Henley's "Heart of the Matter."

"There are people in your life who have come and gone/They've let you down, they've hurt your pride/Better put it all behind you because life goes on/You keep carrying that anger it will eat you up inside."

I forgive you. Even if you don't deserve it. I am not forgiving you for your own good...I am forgiving you for my own.

I am forgiving you and I am moving on.

Diana Rissetto