Sunday, August 29, 2010

How come we don't always believe our friends and family...

...but we believe total strangers?

People are always surprised to learn that I'm pretty lacking in self-confidence. I always have been. In fact, the main character in the play I just had produced is also lacking in self-confidence...but she's also happy and friendly and bubbly and bounces-off of walls...just like I do.

A friend who was helping me with my play told me I had to get to the root of her character...WHY was this girl so insecure, when she comes-off as anything but?

I told him if I was able to figure that out about a fictional character which I had created, I'd be able to figure it out for myself...and my life would be a lot easier!

Last week, I got a push from a person I had known for a half-hour to do something I normally would never do.

This random person I had only known a half-hour told me I was funny and smart and gorgeous with beautiful hair and that I had to be braver because I really had nothing to be so insecure about.

People who love us tell us stuff like that all the time...but we feel like they're telling us it for that very reason...because they love us.

But what did this random person I had only known for a half-hour owe me?

Nothing, really.

The fact that this person had all of this to say about me made me think maybe it's true! Maybe I have a lot of things to be confident about and there's no excuse to ever have any kind of Josie Geller 1989 outlook of life.

I feel like we meet people at exactly the right moments we are supposed to in life...and perhaps I needed to meet that person that night. I needed to hear all of that. I needed that push.

Diana Rissetto

It's been a busy summer...

I haven't had much free time this summer, so I haven't had much time to update over here.

I can now add "Off-Off-Broadway Playwright" to list of Things That I Am. I am also a former Barnes and Noble clerk (and the best Hermione that store had ever seen), a native New Yorker, a theatrical publicist, a dogwalker, a hopeless romantic, a very devoted aunt and, I'd like to think, a nice person.

And now I'm an Off-Off-Broadway Playwright.

I realized how incredibly lucky I am that I am doing what I always said I wanted to do and what I was going to do. I remember writing that I wanted to be a playwright whenever they'd give-us those "What Do You Want to Be When You Grow-Up" things at school. I'm somehow doing that...and that's pretty crazy to me.

I still don't quite feel like a grown-up...but I'm starting to feel like some kind of a playwright.

This entire process has been incredible, and I also learned a lot of lessons the hard way and also learned that I, amazingly, have a lot of people in my life that I can depend on throughout pretty much anything. I realized I had a friend that was willing to calm me down at 3 AM and tell me that everything was going to be okay and that "we'd" figure everything out. I met wonderful people who dove into this project with me, despite not getting paid much and having to give-up a few weeks of their lives in order to submerge themselves in my story.

I watched weirdos that came-out of my own mind come to life on stage and people that didn't know me sit in the audience, follow their journeys and care about them.

I'm glad there is still a place for writers like me in this world. (Actually, I'm glad there is still a place for people like me in this world...)

In the midst of everything, on the night our show opened, somebody from my past also danced (I always prefer to say danced) back into my life after several years. I thought about the 18-year-old girl, insecure and hopelessly romantic, I was when I first met this person and compared her to the person I was that night...a writer at the New York City premiere of her new play, with about fifty friends and relatives cheering her on.

However, part of me will always be that insecure, hopelessly romantic 18-year-old girl when this person is concerned.

I have been feeling withdrawal symptoms since the show closed, but there are no words for how grateful I am for this experience, and for the people it's brought into my life. I am ready and excited for whatever is next...you never know...

Diana Rissetto